Today is a 9-hour workday for me and since I really don’t want to be here until 7pm, I was diligent in getting up when my alarm went off ... despite the fact that I slept terribly last night. It’s been awhile since I have been the only person awake in the house. I actually had plenty of time to get ready since I didn’t have my normal [and welcome, mind you] Rosemary interruptions.

Lately I have been getting a lot of headaches (if you’ve known me for awhile, you’ve known this has been a huge problem in my life, which has mostly been resolved), and it’s been a reminder that I pretty much stopped with my morning stretches on the day Rosemary was born. For the last week or so, I’ve been trying to remember to stretch every day; and today was the first time in, maybe ever?, that my stretches were accompanied with complete silence and peace.

I decided to use the silence to pray and it was such a good way for me to start the day. I asked God to help me have rest and peace. I know there are a lot of techniques out there to relax – and I am definitely open to using them – but I also want the kind of rest and peace that comes from Him. It’s different ... and better.

I started thinking about the verses in Matthew 6:
Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?

I know that verse and think about it often, but I allow my body, my mind, and my spirit to hold onto so much stress. In a lot of ways I think it is a part of my to be tired and stressed out. When I was younger – high school and college age – I used to thrive on having every minute of my 24-hour day planned. I was always telling people I was too busy to do something – and I was, but it wasn’t a problem, I sort of let that define me. I think it is something that has become deeply rooted and I don’t like it about myself/don’t want it to be who I am.

Even if I am busy or have a lot of stresses in my life, I want to be able to have peace first. And just acknowledging that this morning – and asking for help – felt really good.

WARNING: complaints ahead.

• Rain
• Constant headaches
• TWO visits from Aunt Flo
• Rain
• Incredible, humid heat
• Cold rain
• Windy rain
• More rain
• Canker sores that will not go away
• Canker sores going away only to be replaced with new canker sores
• A coupla good arguments with my husband
• Always feeling tired
• Money being much tighter than I'd like it to be
• Being responsible and using my spa gift certificate on a haircut even though I really need a massage
• Here I'll point out the constant headaches again (hence the need for a massage)
• Really wanting October to be over when I usually love October
• Rain